Google, the sprawling tech giant whose tendrils of influence are steadily creeping into every aspect of modern life, have released some important statistics today. They have revealed what it is that we, as a nation, have been most frequently searching for this year; the terms and phrases and questions that drove us to pummel out queries on our keyboards in search of answers. ‘Tis for this, for these comprehensive breakdowns of our habits that we have abandoned Yahoo!; have thrown two fingers at Bing, and have grabbed Jeeves by his lapels and muttered through clenched teeth into his quivering, frightened face “Take a hike, you damned fool!”.
I once knew a man who, several years ago, tried to game the system and get a specific search term onto Google’s most searched lists. He would sit in his room each day repeatedly typing into Google ‘How many geese can you fit in a Volvo?’. He would sit there, in a frenzy, Googling it as frequently as fast as his fingers could type and click. He did this until his broadband was cut off by his internet service provider following an intervention from concerned members of his family and the relevant authorities. Thankfully, following a successful course of medication and therapy he has now been reacquainted with his estranged wife and all of the caged geese that were retrieved from his property have been successfully reintroduced into the wild.
That said, the top search terms that we’ve been searching for this year are all far more reasonable than this. The top overall search terms for the year are as follows:
Top Search Terms:
1) World Cup
2) Avicii
3) Meghan Markle
4) Paddy Jackson
5) Dolores O’Riordan
6) Eurovision
7) Ireland vs New Zealand
8) A Star is Born
9) Cheltenham
10) Stan Lee
The top ‘how to’ search terms also reveal a lot about people’s concerns throughout the year with searches relating to the abortion referendum, GDPR and registering to vote. Bizarrely however, coming in at number 4 in the list is the wildly broad query of ‘how to make eggs’. It is unclear whether this relates to a query about how to cook eggs or the biological processes involved in the creation of embryos.
Top ‘How To’ Searches:
1) How to Register to Vote
2) How to Build an Igloo
3) How to Lose Weight
4) How to Make Eggs
5) How to Get Old Snapchat Back
6) How to Turn Off Automatic Updates
7) How to Tie a Tie
8) How to Claim Tax Back
9) How to Bleed Radiators
10) How to Get Rid of Fruit Flies
